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Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Planning a Wedding is like planning for a stress test :)
The only difference is, is that at the end you get to change your name. But even that takes forever and you have to jump thru 10 million hoops to do it. Unless you are of course the man. Which once again, you get off easy. Who the hell knew, or remembers, how much planning goes into a wedding? No one. And how far in advance you need to start? You just don't think about it. You think, hey it's not for 6 months...well sweetheart, 6 months is really not that far away. Places may be booked. Things take time to order, or get printed. Damn, if you are someone who made lists before this, you are gonna start making lists for your lists. It's just insane.
Who's gonna wear what? Who are you gonna invite? Date? Place? Wedding party? Invites? Food? Favors? Theme? And then the 50 things that you didn't even think about until you start answering all these questions. Yeah, it's like playing whack a mole. And you slowly start wondering if you should just run away and get married. But then wait, people will be disappointed that they weren't a part of it. Well, then we can have just a reception. Yeah, that's a great idea. Let's do that. But wait, our mothers. Children getting married is important to their mothers if no one else. Well do you just go to the court house and just bring the mom's? WTF???
Just realize you aren't gonna make everyone happy. Do what you want to do and make you both happy. Make sure you do what you want and that's all that matters. But even then you are gonna questions your self. You are gonna have to cut corners because you are part of the poor club but you can still have a good time. It doesn't have to be a huge fancy wedding. You aren't fancy, romantic, center of attention people. So go with what's fun and your style. Pig over a fire if you want. Pony rides, slip and slide. Horse Shoes, Country Western dancing. Whatever you want. All that matters is that you will be together, forever. And that the people that you love and that love you will be there with you.
Who's gonna wear what? Who are you gonna invite? Date? Place? Wedding party? Invites? Food? Favors? Theme? And then the 50 things that you didn't even think about until you start answering all these questions. Yeah, it's like playing whack a mole. And you slowly start wondering if you should just run away and get married. But then wait, people will be disappointed that they weren't a part of it. Well, then we can have just a reception. Yeah, that's a great idea. Let's do that. But wait, our mothers. Children getting married is important to their mothers if no one else. Well do you just go to the court house and just bring the mom's? WTF???
Just realize you aren't gonna make everyone happy. Do what you want to do and make you both happy. Make sure you do what you want and that's all that matters. But even then you are gonna questions your self. You are gonna have to cut corners because you are part of the poor club but you can still have a good time. It doesn't have to be a huge fancy wedding. You aren't fancy, romantic, center of attention people. So go with what's fun and your style. Pig over a fire if you want. Pony rides, slip and slide. Horse Shoes, Country Western dancing. Whatever you want. All that matters is that you will be together, forever. And that the people that you love and that love you will be there with you.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
They are called your ex just like it's called your past
No one gets into a relationship thinking "This is only gonna last a few weeks and then I'm out." And most of the time when it ends, one of you, if not both of you are devastated. The sadness can last for a few weeks or you can carry it for years. Some people constantly carry with them doubts or "what if's". What if you gave them that one last chance? What if I just held out a little longer? Maybe he would have changed. You punish yourself with these constant thoughts and never fully move on. You can't really move on until you get your answers. Or atleast get confirmation that the decision you made was the right one.
Sometimes when a relationship comes to an end, you can be so blinded by anger or resentment that you just have no feeling at all. And you question yourself as to why this isn't bothering you. Why don't you feel bad that he's crying? Why don't you want to hug him back? Why can't you say I love you? Why don't you want to give it another try? Why? Is it because you constantly gave them the chance to fix things? You could be tired of your feelings being ignored and over time you have just become numb. Once you get to that point there is no coming back. You are emotionally bankrupt and that's a scary place to be.
You almost get to the point that during the break up, the separation of your lives, everything that you have intertwined together over the years, that you feel sorry for the other person. Not enough to change your mind, or to the point where you want to hug them and say you're sorry. But feel bad that they still have no clue what they did wrong. Feel bad that they think that they did nothing wrong. Feel bad that they think they are perfect. Feel bad that they will never figure it out. But for some unknown reason you will still try to be civil, even though he will cuss and name call and get evil. You will not lower yourself. You will still try to make the whole process painless and easy. You will try to give him an easy start in his new life because that's just how you are.
Yet he will continue to make you miserable and do everything in his power to punish you. Still not seeing that he is doing anything wrong. Still accusing you of being the problem. All the while you are the one who left, he was the one begging you to stay.
Just remember, he is an Ex for a reason. You made the Right decision. And it's called the Past because it's in the Past!
Sometimes when a relationship comes to an end, you can be so blinded by anger or resentment that you just have no feeling at all. And you question yourself as to why this isn't bothering you. Why don't you feel bad that he's crying? Why don't you want to hug him back? Why can't you say I love you? Why don't you want to give it another try? Why? Is it because you constantly gave them the chance to fix things? You could be tired of your feelings being ignored and over time you have just become numb. Once you get to that point there is no coming back. You are emotionally bankrupt and that's a scary place to be.
You almost get to the point that during the break up, the separation of your lives, everything that you have intertwined together over the years, that you feel sorry for the other person. Not enough to change your mind, or to the point where you want to hug them and say you're sorry. But feel bad that they still have no clue what they did wrong. Feel bad that they think that they did nothing wrong. Feel bad that they think they are perfect. Feel bad that they will never figure it out. But for some unknown reason you will still try to be civil, even though he will cuss and name call and get evil. You will not lower yourself. You will still try to make the whole process painless and easy. You will try to give him an easy start in his new life because that's just how you are.
Yet he will continue to make you miserable and do everything in his power to punish you. Still not seeing that he is doing anything wrong. Still accusing you of being the problem. All the while you are the one who left, he was the one begging you to stay.
Just remember, he is an Ex for a reason. You made the Right decision. And it's called the Past because it's in the Past!
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