For Mike :)

Blogger Challenge Day 14

Day 14- A picture of you and your family

This is as close as I can get to a family photo! I told you, I'm horrible with pictures.

Victoria, Me, Grams & Wally!

At my Engagement party 4/16/11

Diaper Facts!

~ The name "diaper" comes from the type of fabric used in the first cloth diapers.

~ Procter & Gamble first commercialized the disposable diaper in the 1950's. Nearly a decade later, Pampers made the diaper out of cellulose rather than paper for greater absorbency.

~ The invention of Velcro in 1980's took the place of safety pins previously used to hold together diapers.

~ California began dispensing diapers in vending machines in 1989. Diaper vending machines are now in public restrooms across the nation.

~ Disposable diapers were so revolutionary when they were introduced that retailers didn't know where to put them in the store.

~ Traditional disposable diapers take about 300 years to biodegrade (some never options break down more quickly).

~ Americans throw away an average of 49 million diapers per day.

~ According to studies, babies go through more than 5,000 diapers before being toilet trained!

~ Courtesy of WebMD ~

For the love of Baseball

"Say this much for baseball - it is beyond question the greatest conversation piece ever invented in America." ~ Bruce Catton

"All I want out of life is that when I walk down the street, people will say "There goes the greatest hitter who every lived ."" ~ Ted Williams

"Every big-leaguer and his wife should teach their children to pray: 'God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, and God bless Babe Ruth.' " ~ Yankees Pitcher Waite Hoyt

"If they came to Josh Gibson today and he was 17 years old, they would have a blank spot on the contract and they'd say, 'Fill the amount in.' That's how good Josh Gibson was."  ~ Junior Gilliam

"I want to be remembered as a ballplayer who gave all he had to give." ~ Roberto Clemente

"Son, I won more games than you'll ever see." ~ Cy Young

"The way I figured it, I was even with baseball and baseball was even with me. The game had done much for me, and I had done much for it." ~ Jackie Robinson

"I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes." ~ Leo Durocher

"Show me a good loser, and I'll show you an idiot." ~ Leo Durocher

"You don't save a pitcher for tomorrow. Tomorrow it might rain." ~ Leo Durocher

"I believe in rules. I also believe I have a right to test the rules by seeing how far they can be bent." ~ Leo Durocher

"Next to Joe DiMaggio, Foxx was the greatest player I ever saw. When Foxx hit a ball, it sounded like gunfire." ~ Ted Williams

"Every great batter works on the theory that the pitcher is more afraid of him than he is of the pitcher." ~ Ty Cobb

"Any ballplayer that don't sign autographs for little kids ain't an American." ~ Rogers Hornsby

"Whoever wants to know the heart and mind of America had better learn baseball, the rules and realities of the game." ~ Jacques Barzun

"He seemed to be doing everything wrong, yet everything came out right. He stopped everything behind the plate and hit everything in front of it." ~ Mel Ott

"When I get through managing, I'm going to open a kindergarten." ~ Yankees Manager Billy Martin

"Hitting is timing. Pitching is upsetting timing." ~ Warren Spahn



Blogger Challenge Day 13

Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

Well this could be a long list of letters! So I'm going to do something alittle different and make it more of a letter to someone I have needed to write a letter to!

Dear Ex-husband,

You have caused me more pain in my life than I can even state. You were just evil to me no matter how much I did! You were always fishing and hunting, but expected me to be at home waiting for you and on you. You were so emotionally abusive, I unfortunately will carry that with me forever. I'm more upset with myself sometimes for letting it go on for 12 years, instead of getting out early. I'm pissed that you decided after I finally left you, that THAT would be the time to go and get diagnoised with Bipolar and put on meds. Why wasn't I good enough for you to do that while we were together? Why did I have to deal with the bastard everyday! What did I do to deserve you being so damn mean all the time? Honestly I didn't even realize how bad it was until I left. I didn't realize that I was so unhappy, or that everyone was seeing what was going on. I thought I had become good at hiding it. And I just wish I could get rid of all that you have done that stays with me still today. I hate you!

Me :)

Thoughts on becoming a mother

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better.

I will be better not because of genetics, or money or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.

I have longed and waited.

I have cried and prayed.

I have endured and planned over and over again.

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.

I will notice everything about my child.

I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle everyday for the rest of my life.

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me.

I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friend will not see.

Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend and sister because I have known pain.

I know disillusionment as I ahve been betrayed by my own body. I ahve been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.

I have prevailed.

I have succeeded.

I have won.

So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.

I listen.

And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard, I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.

I have learned to appreciate life.

Yes I will be a wonderful mother.

~ Author Unknown

If you didn't know....

Mr. Rogers was a Navy Seal. He was combat proven in Vietnam with over 25 confirmed kills. He wore a long sleeved sweater on TV to cover his tattoos. He was a master in small arms and hand to hand combat. After the ware he was ordained as a Presbyterian Minister, therefore becoming a pacifist. He vowed to never harm again and dedicated the rest of his life to trying to help lead children on the right path in life.

Lee Marvin left school to join the United States Marine Corps. He was a scout sniper in the 4th Marine Division. He was wounded in action during WWII Battle of Saipan. His wound (in the butt) was from machine gun fire and severed the sciatic nerve. He was awarded the Purple Heart and given a medical discharge with the rank of Private First Class.

WTF with the Comments!

Why the hell can't I leave comments on anyone's blog? It asks me to sign in 12 million times and still doesn't post it. WTF!!!!

My weekend in pictures

Friday - Gabriel opening his card from Great Grandma B

Posing with his card

We went to Toys R Us to spend our money from Papa Walter

Saturday - Lexi posing with her pirate hat at G's Party

Everyone got a treasure chest

G showing Alyson how to put a pirate on his cake

We are wearing our outfits from Grandma Carol :)

During nap time I went swimming with Baby

Sunday - yes that's Ian dancing on his cereal instead of picking it up GRRRR!

G's Preschool Graduation!

Gabriel and Lucas

Gabriel won "Most Social"

Ian trying to figure out the carnation...LOL

Dilema

I am very torn right now. Part of me wants to start weight watchers again, and the other part doesn't. I do because I know it works and I want to feel better, be healthier. But I don't because it's not cheap. The meetings or buying food to eat differently. And it's hard, takes alot of commitment. I know it sounds lazy and stupid. But that's exactly it. It was alot of work the last time. Yes, I did really well and felt better. But I just don't seem to have the energy this time. I don't know what to do :(

Blogger Challenge Day 12

Day 12- How you found out about Blogger and why you made one

Ummm. I searched for blogging and then up popped you! I made one so I could vent. And share all the stupid and funny shit I find :)

Happy Shit!

"Because expressing how dumb that was just doesn't work"

Unpredictable

Sometimes I wonder if I should have gone off all the meds. I don't think I act any different, but  I guess it's an excuse. If I wasn't on the meds that would explain why I'm so pissed. But it doesn't. I would have gotten this pissed on the meds too. I'm just so sick of everything. And I mean EVERYTHING! I'm tired of Mike being so un-confrontational. When something needs to be dealt with, DEAL WITH IT! I'm tired of the bitch he had kids with. And yes I take it out on him, b/c he decided to have kids with her. And he doesn't confront her about anything. Unless I get super pissed and then he does just because I'm angry. You should do it b/c you are pissed not b/c I'm pissed and you don't want to hear it. I'm tired of her and her fucking mom always getting to do EVERYTHING with the boys. They don't let us do anything unless we plan it 30 weeks in advance. It's absolutely ridiculous. And now they are all going to live together! Oh good fucking LORD! I just can't stand it. I'm tired of having to hear Gabriel tell me how he loves his Daddy 3rd....3rd! After Mommy and Mema. Just fucking ridiculous. I'm tired of having no god damn money. Always being behind. It's really starting to piss me off. "You gotta take care of yourself" YEAH well that's why I'm fucking broke. The flipping co-pays and then my deductible. And then the missing of work b/c I feel like I'm dying. And when I'm not at work I'm not getting paid. It's just too much. Too much shit and I just can't deal anymore!

Not so great week!

This week is definitely starting to suck. And I can't wait for it to be over. I had to go to the doctor yesterday and have a biopsy done on my cervix. Well, they took 9 biopsies! How HELL BATMAN! And it flipping hurt and unfortunately still does. Now the waiting begins. I hate this.

Yesterday Gabriel turned 5! Now he's even "bigger" than Ian. LOL. He's so funny. We get to see him tonight at his preschool graduation. My how the time flies! Kindergarden next year! This weekend we are throwing his birthday party. It's a pirate theme. He's very excited. And we hope to get to take them to see Cars 2...I think Mike and I are just as excited to go see it. :)

Blogger Challenge Day 11

Day 11- Another picture of you and your friends

Wally and Me!



Told you, I need to work on this, I don't have any :(

Blogger Challenge Day 10

Day 10- Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

Happy

Sad

Bored

Hyped

Mad

Blogger Challenge Day 9

Day 09- Something you’re proud of in the past few days

I didn't sit on the computer all weekend. I didn't nap! And I got myself to go in the pool both days!!!

Not Given Up: 101 in 1001

Not Given Up: 101 in 1001: "Started: June 10, 2011 Complete by: March 7, 2014 1. Try to donate blood 2. Kiss in the rain 3. Go camping 4. Tie a note to a balloon ..."

Blogger Challenge Day 8

Day 08- Short term goals for this month and why

Thank god this month is almost over! And I never really have any goals. But my goal for this month is to get our invitations out!!! They should have been out earlier this week but that didn't happen. Stamps are so expensive and we still have to make the RSVP cards. :( But we will get them out no matter what!!! I HOPE :)

Blogger Challenge Day 7

Day 07- A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

LOVE HIM!!! Because of Mike I am able to be drug free...LMAO!

Detox SuckS!!!

I'm going on week 2 of Detox from my meds. I feel so horrible! I hate it!!! On top of that, I hate being more broke than usual from all the dr appointments and not being able to get to work. It just makes everything that much harder. Right now I'm on FMLA to cover my ass for those days when I need to leave early or can't get in. But I hope that everything from here on is easier.

We had so many plans for this past weekend. But between the weather, money and me feeling like crap we didn't do anything. Friday we were going to go the Carnival for the Bethany Fire Department. But we didn't have much money so we had a free code for a Block Buster Express Movie. We did that instead. We got Shrek Forever After. The movie was so cute, but started to skip every 30 seconds so that was a bust. Saturday Mike had to work for awhile. The original plan was to go to the Strawberry Festival in Cheshire & then go to The Carousel Museum. But the weather was kinda iffy and I felt HORRIBLE...Oh and money. 

So Saturday everyone just hung out at home. The boys watched Happily Never After 2. Very cute! Of course Gabriel had to test me. So his attitude when down hill from there. He was not good this weekend at all! Sunday we only had them until 12 so we didn't do anything. I ended up getting really sick in the afternoon. Nasty. Then I fell asleep! He went to work and when I woke up I decided to go in the pool. Victoria was there so we dived for the diving sticks and stuff. 



Of course though it didn't take long for me to be sick to my stomach again. So I went home, changed and just vegged. Then it was time to do work! GROSS!!! I hate working from home. I just don't know why. I hate working in period. LOL. Monday I didn't even make it in to work. I was still so sick. I worked from home for a few hours. I had to do calls with software companies. So much fun. When Mike got home I was passed out again, so he decided to nap too. :) Then we took my car to get the emissions done, looked at cell phones at the mall (I may finally get one I don't hate :)) and we went to Office Depot to get the envelopes for our wedding invites. Maybe now I'll get in gear and get them out soon! But of course, stamps are expensive!!!



I finally broke down on Monday night and picked up the prescription from the dr. It's a med that is supposed to help me through my detox. I didn't want to take anything but I have to be able to function. I hope to only need the 1 pill! I felt better Tuesday and was able to get to work and do a full day! But by the time I got home I was exhausted and felt like crap. I'm at work again Wednesday, and it's half way through the day which is when I start to fade. I'm gonna try to push myself through tho! 



Funny!

Greatest Weakness...

Blogger Challenge Day 6

Day 06- Favorite super hero and why

DARKWING DUCK BABY! He had the coolest theme song :)


Daring duck of mystery,
Champion of right,
Swoops out of the shadows,
Darkwing owns the night.
Somewhere some villain schemes,
But his number's up.

(3-2-1) Darkwing Duck (When there's trouble you call DW)
Darkwing Duck (Let'sget dangerous)
Darkwing Duck (Darkwing, Darkwing Duck!)

Cloud of smoke and he appears,
Master of surprise.
Who's that cunning mind behind
That shadowy disguise?
Nobody knows for sure,
But bad guys are out of luck.

'Cause here comes (Darkwing Duck)
Look out! (When there's trouble you call DW)
Darkwing Duck (Let's get dangerous)
Darkwing Duck (Better watch out, you bad boys)
Darkwing Duck!

A Marine

Marines come in all shapes, shades, weights, sizes, and states of sobriety, misery, and confusion. He is sly as a fox, has the nerve of a dope addict, the stories of an old sailor, the sincerity of a politician, and the subtly of Mt. Saint Helen. He is extremely irresistible, totally irrational and completely indestructible.

A Marine is a Marine all his life. He is a magical creature. You
can kick him out of your house but not out of your heart. You can take him off your mailing list but not off your mind. They are found everywhere... in love...in battle... in lust... in trouble...in
debt...in bars and ... behind them. No one can write so seldom and yet think so much of you. No one else can get so much enjoyment out of a letter or clean clothes or a six pack.

You may as well give in. He is your long distance lover...he is
your steel eyed, warm smiling, blan k minded, hyperactive, over reacting, curious, passive, talented, spontaneous, physically fit, good for nothing bundle of worry.....
And will always be there for you regardless of how long its been since you've last talked."

A Marine is a genius with a deck of cards. A millionaire without a cent and brave without a grain of sense. He is the PROTECTOR OF AMERICA, with the latest copy of playboy in his back pocket. When he wants something it's usually 30 days leave, music that hurts the ears, a five dollar bill...or a woman he can count on.

Girls love them, mothers tolerate them, fathers brag about them, the government pays them, the police watch out for them and somehow they all work together. You can beat their bodies but not their minds.

You can tame their hearts but not their souls. He likes girls,
females, women, ladies, and the opposite sex. He dislikes small
checks, working weekends, answering letters, missing chow, waking up, maintaining a uniform, and the day before payday.

How the HELL!